So I was thinking today about life and how weird it is. I remember elementary school. In 6th grade we thought we were the shit. We owned the school and nobody was better than us. At recess we would do what we wanted when we wanted it and if the duty lady didn’t like it she could kiss our asses. I mean we would play soccer at recess and then turn it into rugby. I mean hard core rugby, we would tackle each other and everything. It was intense. And clearly we weren’t supposed to do that, I’m sure multiple people got hurt and such, but we didn’t care. We did it anyway. One time we were actually playing soccer. But one of the 3rd grade classes were doing something on part of the field. Well we played anyway. One time the ball went into their class and one of the class parents grabbed the ball and started to lecture us. Get this, we stole the ball out of his hands and kept playing. No joke, stole it out of his hands. I mean we thought we were the shit. God damn.
But on the other hand, I was so uncool in elementary school. In 6th grade I had 2 true friends: Kim and Kam. One day they were both not there and at recess I hung out by myself. I was so pathetic. But looking back, 6th grade was good. It was the first time I ever really had a good, good friend. Kam and I did everything together. When we came back from the weekend our teacher would sometimes ask everyone what they did and only one of us would have to answer as it almost always consisted of the same thing. It was the first time I felt like I was on top of the world. 9th grade was good too. We were on top again and it felt good.
Homework used to be so easy. The other day I was watching someone do some calculus or something and remembered back to 5th grade GATE when we first started doing algebra. I was so freaking confused. What was “x”? How did it represent a number? And now I can do derivatives and shit? Damn. Life was simple back then. Read a novel and write a book report---that shit was easy. Papers were personal experience, creative writing and stuff. I wish just once I could write another paper about my favorite summer vacation or something like that. But no, now its analyze this, research that.
Do you remember when boys didn’t like girls and girls didn’t like boys? Or if they did it was simple. “I like you. Do you like me? Check yes or no.” Why don’t we do that anymore? It would make things so much simpler. No wondering or worrying about it. You could find out and get over it. Ugh. We used to have this spot under the stairs to the boys bathroom called the “kissing corner.” We would play boys v. girls and the boys would try to chase the girls and get them in the kissing corner and then kiss them. But sometimes, depending on the boy, we would let them catch us. Although I don’t ever remember any actual kissing happening. The boys were all too wimpy.
Shit was good. I remember my first day of elementary school in first grade. My parents took me and I carried all of my stuff in a brown paper bag from Albertson’s. What if people’s parents brought them to the first day of class in college? That would be so crazy.
My parents were together back then, both my brothers were at home. I didn’t really like them. That’s not really true, but I like them a lot better now, they just got on my nerves a lot. And then after they left I realized how much I actually missed them. The night before Austin left for college Blaine and I slept on his floor. It was so great, I wish we could still do that. The 3 of us are rarely even in the same state anymore, let alone sleeping in the same room. Then after Austin took his semester off of college, I had to say goodbye to him all over again. By the time Blaine left for New York I was used to saying goodbye. But it still sucked. I look at some people I know whose siblings are closer to their age and they are so close. I wish I was like that.
Anyway. I have a bibliography due tomorrow and I haven’t started the research. So I should really get on that.
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